Going public (and perhaps rogue?)

Well, I have been lackadaisical in blogging, but it's been on my mind so I decided to open up my blog to the public (eek) and see if that forces me to do more with it.  As I type this, I am doubting my decision, so maybe I'll pull back by the end of the day - I'll sit with it a bit. 

Thinking a lot these days about my calling versus what I do for a living.  My calling, which I didn't discover until very recently, is working with women in preparing for and going through labor (natural childbirth being my strong preference) and assisting them during the postpartum period and with breastfeeding.  So, I am becoming.  Becoming what? A labor and postpartum doula, a childbirth educator and a lactation educator.  What does that mean? Here's an explanation on the scope of practice for these "jobs" (and I use quotes because although they are paid jobs, it's hard for me to consider any of them a job as I associate a job with something I don't want to actually do) from the Childbirth and Postpartum Professional Association (CAPPA) website http://www.cappa.net/about-cappa.php?scope-of-practice.  I share this resource for those of you who may be pregnant or are trying to get pregnant and are thinking about and planning your labor and birth. 
There are many resources out there that people do not seem to know about.  I am always shocked that in 2011, I still routinely hear from pregnant friends this question: "what is a doula?" I move in certain circles where these things are just known.  I am always happy to educate and expand people's knowledge of what birth can be. 
I decided to train with CAPPA and work toward my certifications in these areas instead of just "throwing up a shingle" because I believe that having a scope of practice and being affiliated with a professional association is a good thing  for both me and my clients.  Besides, there is a lot for me to learn - going through my own natural childbirth was something that I think goes into the experience and qualifications category - but there is so much more to know to be able to effectively help women and their partners during birth.  Also, I'm a lawyer by trade and we like things like licenses, degrees, certifications and professional associations.  It just makes me feel safe, for lack of a better word.
In the past year, I have been lucky to help some of my friends via email and phone prepare for their natural childbirth and/or vaginal deliveries (some with epidurals) and to field their questions about breastfeeding and other postpartum issues.  I've had a great experience doing so and I've gotten feedback that my advice has been helpful.  Often my advice is born from my own experience and I do a lot of pointing women to resources that are out there to help them.  Any day where I have helped and supported a friend with her labor and postpartum needs, is a good day for me.  Today was such a day when I recieved an email from a friend who recently gave birth inviting me to view her blog about her labor and her postpartum experiences (plus cute pics of her beautiful baby girl).  I was one on a small list of people invited whom she thanked for sharing a positive birth story that helped and encouraged her through her own natural childbirth.  So, today is a good day.  This is my calling.  This is my purpose. 
I come to a job every day because I have to and I work it because I need to help support my family - but it is not my calling.  Perhaps it once was, but every moment is a new moment, we are always changing so our dreams change as well.  My training as a Buddhist hammers this home again and again - everything is impermanent.  My plan: within 5 years, to be engaged in my calling - to be working with women and their partners and spreading the gospel about natural birth - and doing some law work on the side to fill in the financial gaps.  I put this out to the world because perhaps it will help doors open in ways I could not imagine - much as my pregnancies (one miscarriage and one beautiful healthy Tiger boy) opened doors in my life I could never have foreseen (I'll post more on that at another time).  I carry very hefty student loans, that is what currently stands in my way from quitting my job today.  I am trying to find ways to make this all work - anyone out there in the world want to lend a hand or have some ideas? I'd love to hear your stories, thoughts and words of encouragement.
Next post, I'll share my journey - how I got here - including my birth story.  Thanks to all the women out there who continue to do this good work and inspire me forward.